Much is being mentioned about the recent photo of ‘Farage’ in front of a poster. So, very little was mentioned about the poster from that group called ‘OBV’ who posted a poster of a skinhead abusing an old Asian lady. Now, in my simple mind, the most abusive racist poster is most certainly the see-saw one, hands down its dreadful. Why wasn’t this given the huge media shit that the leave campaign get? Oh, erm…
Your choice folks.
This post is a slightly different yet very difficult one to explain, and even write. For one, I am not going to spend too much energy on it.
10th Oct 2010 I was diagnosed as having sarcoidosis. I had all symptoms (the medics loved me!), including shadows in my body, and weird shit on my skin and in my eyes. What followed this diagnosis of a hideous illness was loss of job, loss of home, and eventual bankruptcy (charities Ssafa and The RBL had got involved by then). Anyone wants to know why the government pretty much abandoned me then please ask! I went down on record as single white male – hence I’m at the bottom of all list’s for help.
Sarcoidosis came to my rescue, because I was ill, a home through Bradford’s open moves (lovely lady helped me big time), became available two weeks before I was due to be evicted (I was at a top friends home when the call came through). Daft thing is, I’m sort of ‘cool’ with this as it’s all a blur…
What followed was ridiculous assessments by Atos; I was fit for work yet my body was falling to bits! The disability section of the employment office were quite sickened, as were my medics, even my GP banged his desk when we were going through ‘stuff’ ffs. I did still try carrying on with life as erm, most would class as ‘normal’ yet the weight loss was bonkers.
I volunteered to get work through Leeds Remploy. They couldn’t understand why I decided upon this, I did because I wanted to work. In the meantime my case had reached the parliamentary ombudsman (MP involved). Even though I failed at each stage of getting there, I got there! This in itself wasn’t good for my health, so I finally, and annoyingly withdrew. At the same time other drugs were being swallowed, esp the 40mg/day of prednisolone.
Harping on far more than I intended.
I got quite ill when working through Remploy and then that job finished.
Early 2015, and after Atos visited me I was awarded (means tested) ESA and placed into the Support group, I was awarded (means tested PIP (replacement to DLA)), and to my surprise some was back dated. I’m covered until 2017/18 and do try return to friends some of that passionate help they gave me. I still intend on working, but my body fails under any form of stress and anxiety, do the doubters want me to die – answers please…
The idea of my benefits is to try and allow me to live rather than survive. So, to those who have called me a lefty cunt and scrounger, to those who do wonder how and why, and to those who don’t understand what and how the ‘system’ works.
It’s fucking difficult…
Here is some truth through my passion of freedom of speech; freedom of speech, empty promises, over qualified, might get bored, and earmarked vacancies, but could it be discrimination? Jeez, this past year I feel that I have experienced them all, especially at work. Very grateful to Leeds Remploy for getting me into work at Enterprise, and very grateful to them too. But then, some facts.
I was promised so much upon achieving that position, and so, that story begins… One thing is for sure, my sarcoidosis is certainly playing up due to some recent events, including the redundancy situation and my want of trying to progress. Read on…
This was at the beginning of August, though told not to worry its human nature to worry.
First thing that happened was my Ankle dots, this is a first sign that the sarcoid is becoming more active.
This is certainly an activity that sarcoids know only too well, it can quite easily develop into Bilateral Uveitis. On Friday 27th Sept both of my eyes started.
Simply put I just could not understand why I failed at three interviews I should have walked into, other positions came up without being advertised that I was more than capable and qualified to do. This week I recieved a letter saying that my new position is gas restoration administrator, that is a high stress job, the most stressful in in the office that no one likes doing, especially on £6:60/hour, although I have the current tax credits but only till March 2014. If any working position a one in ten sarcoid needs to avoid its a stressful one. No wonder my body has gone and started reacting again, jeez.
When I was at the initial interview I was told plenty of opportunities would be available for me to progress. At home I got a few phone calls from the manager who mentioned ‘off the record’ I would be able to progress pretty quickly with the qualifications and experience I have; qualified plumber, trained in the 5Cs by the SMMT, HNC Technology and Management through Leeds Metropolitan University, and been a manufacturing manager. I had two other jobs on offer through Leeds Remploy, also someone else from my current place of employment at Pottery Fields House in Leeds phoned to offer a position, but I had given my word to the manager of my future team.
Lets cut quite abit out, I asked abit about progression, I was asked by another manager to take my 5C improvements documents and information with me, so I did, and after two weeks of no one showing interest I took them home, that was my first thought that I had made some kind of mistake, but glad to be working, proving to some degree that one in ten sarcoids can work, but I felt my chances of progression were much less than first mentioned.
Lets cut quite abit more out, in June I got a chest infection and ended up on anti-pneumonia tablets, chest infections can unsually kill sarcoids, especially the mentioned one in tens, that I have officially been told I am, proper scary times that. Before being that ill I did not tell work how unwell I felt until later, my lesson learnt to be upfront fully about sarcoidosis. I had a staged return in July with yet some further promises of progression, by the end of July the medics said that they believed I had gone into remision – fantastic!
At that point I thought I may as well start applying for other positions, and at the seem time my team got the redundancy notice, shit, bad timing for me as I need the sarcoid to stay none active. Three interviews later and those other jobs not advertised yet taken, phew, the reasons are absolutely garbage why I am not getting the jobs, the funniest of ‘your 5Cs knowledge and answer were not good enough’ eh! I’m trained by the SMMT – look them up! I even have my plumbing with the gas and pressure systems units. Before the interviews for one of the positions, I was told who would be getting it, then, I overheard two folks chatting about that job, but they must still get the C.V. in, yes that person got the job. I have started to be at a loss why I have not been getting jobs that I am certainly much more capable of than others! 27th September it finally hit me, from my previous experience we know a company is not supposed to discriminate but yes they do, it is not a nice feeling.
In May Enterprise were taken over by Amey, at Pottery Fields House Amey work for Northern Gas Networks, I so thought my experience and knowledge of the 5Cs and construction should have stood me in a great manner of progression, and now the current position that I feel cornered into is causing the sarcoid to raise its ugley head again. Yes my freedom of speech, nothing and no one harmed here apart from my own facts and me. All I wanted was a chance to progress and help the company succeed. Other stuff happened, I am also very glad of being given the chance to work, but we are laerning just what causes the sarcoid to become lively. Now I will stop right here.
Stu.
, read the Blues in Britain magazine review or listen to my BCB Radio interview.