Mind You…

I still cant be arsed.

Kick Start?

Well, decided I must try and get on with the site again, it’s like having a great dream then waking up depressed, so maybe write about the dreams, potentially in detail? Though the site needs loads of tidying up.

2024 it’s March 10th

Well obviously I no longer post much on here. This site is approaching 20 years old, it has covered so much of my life and by the time I’m 60 I hoped my posting would have increased for the better.

Anyways, thought I would try something different. Last week I joined Tinder, paid about £20 for a month, put in the age range of 50 – 62. It seems pretty much most of the women were asking to meet fellas with own home and own car, I do have a little 18 year old Suzuki, works well for me and to get me out and about. They also say must enjoy travelling – the world and be solvent – very, I have never sniffed glue, whats that all about. Needless to say I deleted the membership after about 5 days.

I found it quite depressing, I have two wonderful successful sons and absolutely nothing else to show for my life apart from Sarcoidosis and my mental health issues. I’ve been trying to get back into doing music and writing though I find it’s a very lonely place though still trying to.

July 27th I am 60 years old, I were thinking about a party though I have decided against this, in fact reaching 60 does not interest me at all, for those who say put things into perspective, I leave that to DaVinci.

The End, In The Year 2023

What to say, well it’s all been pretty much the same in the village named Earth, utter bollocks isn’t it.

After four days in bed, it is one of the worse attacks I have had, they seem to get worse as I get older, illness and death are not a competition, physical problems and mental issues, it is not a competition so for me it is not about putting anything into ‘perspective’ leave that to DaVinci.

In the year 2024 I am 60, July, 27th to be spot on, born in a leap year, life has had some incredible leaps so if I reach that birthday I am going to have a party, if I don’t then I hope there will still be a party…

Onwards, again.

Statins

Started on some more heart and blood meds, have to take at night. Super tired when I get up but they seem to help my heart as it seemed to work too hard pumping the blood around. Thing is, when in my sleep my heart does stop, along with my breathing (sleep apnea) I have been treated for it and have the mask and machine I can wear if I wanted to. Though my body restarts itself when I cough and then happen to breath deeply.

Eventually this wont happen, I am more than ready, anyways time for breakfast…

Actually, it is me.

This is the most up to date capture of me, myself and I. The realisation is that I think I have hit a late midlife crises. I got rid of all my home mirrors, I rarely let any kind of ‘shots’ be taken of me, I only see myself in a pub mirror. Below, Royal Air Force 1983…

And so I am sharing, this year I have spent so much time in bed, I must avoid becoming a reclusive hermit again. The bearded photo were taken by a top friend who I met about five years or so ago and I must remind myself I have actually come a long way within that time.

So, I am 59 July 27th, I’m giving myself some kind of agenda to target (I dont do plans as plans can fail, agendas can be worked through), by the time of my 60th I am going to try get something creative published.

On this site I have some great stuff, as mentioned before, and maybe try actually do something with it plus the new ‘stuff’ I am thinking out loud about.

Mind you, I have bought new jumpers, shirts, socks. shoes, coats, jackets and my favorites, lots of hats, though I hate folks trying to touch and lift them off, not good.

Life; Marmite or Salt?

At 58 I feel like I am approaching a roundabout with 58 exits, one for each year of my life. I could narrow it down to how many years I might have left or rather just the two exits of Marmite and Salt or maybe the traditional crossroads.

Anyway, Marmite you either like it or you don’t and you can take things with a pinch of Salt and not worry about it. I feel somewhere in between, I am becoming more unsettled with my mind, I take meds for that and other things.

It is confusing as I know far more folks are in a worse position of life than myself, it is not a matter of pull myself together or any of the insulting remarks people can try and offer. My dreams are getting ever more horrific yet also satisfying, for the previous years I have tried writing about ‘everything’ and sometimes it is pretty good yet I struggle to concentrate.

I use to do some great creative stuff on this site as mentioned ‘Sarcoidosis, the good the bad and lots of in between’ though I am now diagnosed with a Severe Psychological Behaviour Disorder.

Why am I writing this? Well, just to see if I can start to concentrate for small periods at a time and get back to regular blogging…

I love Marmite and hardly use Salt.

In The Year 2023

My third and final message this year.

In 2023 I would like to see George Orwell’s 1984 go back to being fiction rather than actually happening. During this year I have been trying to get my head around various ‘issues’ that I would like to do or they bother me, so much failed mainly due to my confidence.

In 2023 I will be attempting some more positive though small steps, like I try every year but the anxiety and depression always beat me leading to stress which can then bring on the Sarcoidosis, I genuinely do not like that cycle. I do have a few folks who are more than willing to help me, though I always feel like I am setting myself up to letting folks down.

In 2023 I will make more of an effort and try get use to the upper dentures I have now got, I have 11 teeth left, mainly on the lower jaw. After the wounds finally healed, last week I wore them for the first time, used some Fixodent but the denture were far from a good fit, it fell out twice so I will go back and see if they can make it fit better, I am not confident to wear it again.

In 2023 I will continue to try and be nice and kind.

In the Year 2022

Well it’s almost been a year since I did anything on here, almost got rid of it but so much history has been recorded; the good, the bad and lots of in-betweens.

And so I have decided at 58 to actually try better within the creativeness of me, got the Twitter and Instagram sorted, have the YouTube channel but it needs so much doing with it, maybe just now leave that and stick to those two.

I’m going to try and keep out of politics, it’s the worse I have ever seen, especially how the MSM spin everything, perhaps I will mention my opinions on here?

Although I do have alot to sort on this site, ch changes abound.

So, Twitter is @StuartBriggs_ and Instagram is StuartBriggs_

Lets see eh…

In the Year 2021

This site is about 17 years old, it carries so much history of my life. last year I came close to just letting it go. I use to post so many ‘things’ that were so much fun to do and much more about my battles with illness and what comes with all that.

In 2021 so much of the news has been depressing, I suffer anxiety stress and depression without all the doom and gloom added. This post I hope to keep straight forward and simple as I hope to be writing far more from now on…

My opinions on some important issues arising in 2021: Child abusers should serve a minimum of 25 years in prison. Murderers should serve a minimum of 25 years in prison. Those carrying knives etc. should serve a minimum of 10 years in prison. Animal abusers should serve a minimum of 10 years in prison. Men should not be in womens spaces including prison. Men should not be taking part in womens sport.

I have many other opinions but the above will do as some of the stuff from 2021 are simply sickening and ridiculous. I believe this really is what the vast majority of the United Kingdoms population, though silent, would want.